Psychological Mind-games of the Insanely Lame….

Brain says no...

That title is all about me… Me, myself and I. It popped into my head one day after a psychological warfare was underway in the deepest recesses of my cranial cavity. What was the internal conflict? Me panicking about going out. Yup… as simple as that. And because of all the different synapses firing off inside my skull, I worked myself up so much that I started shitting every hour. Sadly, I’m dead serious. That’s how messed up my tummy was! Thus my whole ordeal started from 9am that Saturday morning and ended when the first sip of gin & tonic hit my lips. Well actually if I’m being completely honest, it started when the event was booked. But all the shitting, fortunately for me, was the day of. How thoughtful of my stomach and brain. With that being said, I have no idea how my brain has turned into such a mess. It has somehow suffered a short circuit (possibly several) where once the internal workings were such a smooth process, but now,  convulsions take place internally instead. Isn’t that nice…

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The 40 Odd Things That I’m Thankful For….

Thanksgiving

Pandas, since today’s Thanksgiving I figured it would only be fitting to say what I’m thankful for instead of just eating all day long. So here it goes…

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Beauty in Today’s Society Has Got Me All Messed Up…

Mad, Frustrated at Beauty Industry

Last week someone snapchated me after about a year of not talking to each other. It wasn’t due to any one significant reason but a few little mediocre ones. All I’m saying is, he did some annoying/questionable things. But before I changed numbers I remembered him whatsapping me trying to meet up before he moved back to his country of origin. I, like all people who can’t be bothered to confront someone, ignored him. Anyway, long story short, he got back in touch and sent me a snap on a Saturday night about a week ago.

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A Girl’s Guide: To Surviving Alcohol

loveLucyDrunk

I’ve been meaning to write this post since last Thursday, when I came to work hungover, but since I was feeling like one of The Walking Dead Zombies, I didn’t have much brain power. And if I’m being completely honest, I’ve been drinking since last Wednesday, which is why I haven’t written anything new lately…oops! Anyway, today is a brand new day; plus I’m ready, sober and willing.

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Sleepovers Are Not What They Once Were… The older you get, the more stuff you bring.

packing

Remember when you were younger and you got invited to sleepovers? How excited were you being able to go to someone else’s house?! It was like a mini adventure. Almost like a safari of learning how other animals live in their natural habitat. You would pack the bare essentials like your favourite toys to play with and you were off. But as the years flew by your little backpack of “bare essentials” became a trunk of  unwavering ammunition. Nowadays by the time you even get to your friend’s house, your back is out because of all the shit you’ve packed and you are ready to fall asleep. My how times have changed!

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It’s a Very Sad Day For Bubble Wrap….Prepare to Shed Some Tears

Bubble Wrap is not going to pop anymore

Pandas!! I just can’t! I have some horrible news. The bubble wrap that you have grown to love for all these years is about to get a makeover. Maybe some of you are thinking that I’ve lost it over bubble wrap. Quite possibly. Or you might be asking, why in the hell is she getting so bent up out of shape over this news?! WELL, this “new” bubble wrap (soon to be labelled iBubble) will cease to pop. That’s right! No more popping of the bubbles pandas. Oh the lunacy. I can’t bear the thought! A life without the sound of popping.

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The Hottest Day in London in Ten Years and All I Could Do Was Pray For A Tiny Kiddie Pool…All DAY…For The Past 9 Hours.

hottest day in London Heatwave

You see the above photo my pandas? It’s my photo that I edited. This is what I have been wishing for all day here in London. For the heavens to literally open up and cry out a storm. I have been begging for a kiddie pool to be magically delivered to my office. I have prayed for some sort of miracle all day but have I received said miracle, of course not. Why in god’s good unicorned care bears would he see fit to grant me with a kiddie pool. Even though I think it’s a perfectly good request.

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